One of the first books that started my journey of getting me out of my funk and trying to clean up the train wreck way of thinking was, “UnF*ck Yourself” by John Gary Bishop.
Clearly, if you don’t like foul language, he is probably not the way to go BUT it is a fantastic book.
[Side note: He is really fun to listen to on audiobook with the Scottish accent.]
This is not a sugar coated, think positive, or it’s all sunshine and rainbows, type of book. As he says, “this is a conversational slap from the universe.”
The book begins with; “the language you use to describe your circumstances, determines how you see, experience, and participate in them, and dramatically affects how you deal with your life and confront your problems…”
This was not a new concept for me. As I mentioned in the How We Got Here, Pt 2 post; my Dad always taught me the lessons described in Phil 4:8 “…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.” [Yes, I realized the weirdness of placing a Bible verse in a piece about a book that uses the word f*ck on the regular, but I love Jesus but I cuss a little. *shrug*)
I got it. I understood it but I was not investing it into practice. (Sadly, sometimes we have to hear things from other people, who aren’t family, before we truly take action on them.)
I was definitely bitter, frustrated, convinced life was out to get me, and overall negative. So, when I listened to this book, it really was what he said; a slap in the face. I will admit, it was a necessary one.
One of the chapters that really stuck with me was:
I am Willing.
A few of the quotes from the chapter that really packed a punch for me were:
“If you are not willing to take the actions to change your situations, in other words, if you are willing to put with your situation, then whether you like it or not, that is the life you’ve chosen.”
“In defending your circumstances as they are right now, you are actually making a case for being where you are.”
"To start this new process, you must first stop another one. Stop blaming luck. Stop blaming other people. Stop pointing to outside influences or circumstances.”
“You have the life you’re willing to put up with.”
Wow! I mean really, wow.
Anyone else feel somewhat attacked by those words? I sure did.
I was most definitely utilizing blaming. I was making excuses for why my life was the way that it was. I was not taking ANY responsibility for my life and it was, in fact, MY life.
Think about it. The definition of “my” is “belonging to or associated with the speaker.”
It is mine. I have ownership of it. I control what I do with it.
No, I cannot control all the circumstances that come my way, but I can control how I handle those circumstances.
I can control MY behaviors.
I can control MY words.
I can control MY thoughts.
I can control MY actions.
It is MY life and I had to ask myself; if I was willing for the current situation to be my story.
I was not.
However, I was willing to make changes to live the life I wanted.
I was willing, to improve MY story.
I encourage you pick up or listen to this book. We all could use a little slap in the face occasionally, to get us to refocus.
Ashley
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